Frightening Reality

My mind is blown away today by this book I am reading, "When People are Big and God is Small".  Our culture has redefined what spirituality is and what a relationship with God looks like. Here is a summary of the last chapter I just read, "These assumptions (from our culture today) have infected the church: the self as more important than community, the self as good, the exaltation of feelings and needs, and spirituality that is divorced from the death and resurrection of Jesus and a lifestyle of faith and obedience." This means that we focus on ourselves, look to our emotions for truth, say, 'screw you,' to community, believe that good dwells within us from ourselves, believe that there is some mystery in the world like God or something, and Jesus has nothing to do with anything! This is appalling to me not just because it's true of the world I live in but because many of these things cut to my core as well.  

For instance, I exalt my feelings constantly. My feelings are a huge part of who I am. I talk about them all the time. I journal and pray to God about them. I share them with others. I base most of my decisions on my feelings. "I don't feel like eating what's in my fridge, I'll get take out." or "I don't feel like reading so let's waste away in front of the tv" or "I don't feel like trying to meet my neighbors so I will just skype with my boyfriend instead"  What does this leave me with though? I find a higher authority in my feelings than God himself?!? Ouch! That is the reality of it. By basing my everyday life on my feelings, I completely leave Jesus out of the picture. I look to myself for truth and understanding just based on a feeling. I will be honest and share with you that much of last semester I really struggled with my time with God because I didn't feel his presence. I ended up distancing myself from him because I was upset for the feeling that I was missing. That's not Biblical at all! I am supposed to live by faith in Jesus Christ. That means praying and reading my Bible even if I don't feel like it. It means seeking God even when I don't feel His presence. It means to seek out guidance from others and actually adhere to what they say instead of looking to myself to see if I feel like I agree with them.

This is some hard truth. I have a lot of reevaluating to do. How much of life is comprised of things that culture says verse what the Bible says and what God says? It's a frightening reality. AND I just shared with you only one of the hard realities from this chapter! Imagine the other things our culture has imbedded us with that has nothing to do with Jesus Christ and we claim as truth for ourselves! 

I want to join together in community and claim the truth that we know from Scripture. I want to share with people about who Jesus really is and not the psycho-babble we have come up with as a culture (even among Christians). I don't really know what this looks like. This is my first exploration of some of these ideas. I would love to learn with you.  Let's figure out what this means together. Will you investigate with me and work towards shifting ideas in our culture?

A New Beginning

It's the start of a new year and here I have been sitting moping around not ready for anything to begin. I thought about what it is that brings me joy and energy and I continued to be stuck in this funky mood not excited about anything. I finally started journaling to try and talk to God about what has been going on. I realized what I love to do is help people and pour into their lives. Here begins one of my projects for the new year. I am going to write to you all at least on a weekly basis about whatever is going on in my life and hopefully it will be helpful, perhaps entertaining or maybe even convicting.  I am not really sure what God has in store for this but I do know that God has given me lots to share.

Here's what it is on my heart right now:

I read Leviticus 1 and 2 today. These chapters are about offering up sacrifices to the Lord. It is very descriptive about the procedures that go into sacrifices. One of the most crucial things is that whatever the sacrifice it is, it has to be of the best that you have. So if you are sacrificing an animal, it has to be one without blemish.  The best of the best. The one that you would want to save for yourself to breed or to eat or whatever.  I was thinking about how that applies to my life.  Do I really give Jesus the best of my best? Do I really give 10% of my earnings with a cheerful heart?  Honestly, I do give, it's not exactly 10% and it's set up to just be taken out of my account every month so I don't have to worry about it. I am happy to give but I rarely even think about the fact that I am. Is that really giving the best of my best then? Shouldn't I want to strive to give even more than 10%?  I think that I do so I am going to do my best to get rid of my debt so I can give more and more.  

But money is just part of what God asks of me. What about my time?  Yes, I am in full time ministry and yes I go to church. Is that really the best of my best? Am I doing so with a cheerful heart? Do I go into everyday with a cheerful heart ready to give God my best?  Absolutely not. I often wake up not wanting to get out of bed. I will sleep in to the last minute and then not have time for my daily devotion or prayer in the morning. I will go into the day crabby and not really desiring to do whatever is on my to do list.  Is that serving God? Not really. If I just go into the day with an apathetic attitude trying to just check things off my list I am not really living my life for the Almighty Creator, the God of heaven and earth, the Prince of Peace, My Savior.  

Now, I am doing a heart check. God has given me so many gifts and abilities and I feel as though I have been wasting them. I am now trying to come up with creative ways to serve others and God in my daily life instead of just trying to figure out the big picture stuff.  I want to give God the best of my best.  I am starting by spending time with Him, writing this blog, and figuring out ways to get connected in my community.  I already feel a little better knowing that I am not just going to sit around my apartment wasting away waiting for whatever is next and doing nothing else. God has given me life to live! I want to live with great joy and bring honor to God. 

What about you? Are you giving the best of the best to God on a daily basis? What needs to look different in your life? What can you do even today?